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| Ridgefield Press By Macklin Reid "My son died Sept. 10, 1996, of a heroin overdose, snorting heroin," said Virginia Katz. "He was a college student, an athlete and very popular." "He began with alcohol and died of a heroin overdose," Amy Jonsson said of Mrs. Katz's son. "He was a star athlete, very popular, very good looking, had a lot of friends --- he looks just like so many of our Ridgefield kids --- He was 20 when he died." Ms. Jonsson, a guidance counselor at East Ridge Middle School, has arranged for Mrs. Katz to come to Ridgefield next week to talk about her son. "For all those parents out there who say this will never happen to my kids, believe me, this will change our mind," Ms. Jonsson said. Mrs. Katz, from Norwalk, will speak to ninth and tenth graders at Ridgefield High School at 8:30 a.m. on Monday, Oct. 16, then to eighth graders at East Ridge Middle School at 1 p.m. same day. On Wednesday, Oct. 18, at 7 p.m. at East Ridge Middle School's auditorium, Mrs. Katz and her husband Larry talk to parents. Mrs. Katz is not one of the slick motivational speakers who are often engaged to bring students a "stay clean" message in an uplifting context of personal empowerment, complete with laugh lines. "This is a real life story --- she is not a motivational speaker," Ms. Jonsson said. "They won't laugh in this presentation, It really tugs at the heart." In Denial When Mrs. Katz addresses parents, the message is pointed as well as poignant. "Some of the parents don't want to see," she said. "I don't want to be negative, but that's called denial." "What I'm trying to say is, even if your child isn't using drugs, or you don't think they're using drugs, a parent needs to find out everything a child is being exposed to," Mrs. Katz said. "The fact is children are being exposed to drugs at a very early age. Nationwide, the average age of first use is 12, and in Connecticut, it's 11." And in sophisticated Connecticut, the atmosphere is more dangerous. "Connecticut kids use alcohol at rates 10% to 12% higher than the national average," Mrs. Katz said. "In the state's most recent survey, 13% of seventh graders and 28% of 11th graders said that they had been drunk in the last week --- with being drunk defined as consuming five or more drinks. One in 20 high school seniors now smoke marijuana on a daily basis." Mrs. Katz and her husband Larry have given 145 drug-awareness presentations through The Courage to Speak, an organization that fosters open communication to further the prevention of alcohol and drug use among young people. The Journey "I'm going to talk to parents about my story, what happened with my son, the journey we took with him," she said. "He called up crying from college, asking for help, and at that time it was extremely serious, and at that point we could not control the situation," she said. "...He was the only one that could make those changes in his life. He came home with a significant addiction and he regretted it tremendously. He did. He was in recovery." Mrs. Katz's earliest knowledge of her son's drug and alcohol problems was when he was in his first year of high school. "Freshman year, he was taken in to the police station because three friends were found in the park with marijuana," she said. "He went into counseling and so on. We were aware and we did everything we could in order to get him what he needed as far as sound counseling is concerned. We didn't have our heads in the sand." But she believes it was something that began when he was even younger. "My gut instinct tells me, when I look back, though, that marijuana use started in junior high," she said. "It's a case of denial. And once he was picked up by the police it just smacks you in the face, you can't ignore it any more." "This is the type of disease that when you have a family member who's involved, you're somewhat powerless," Mrs. Katz said. "And that's why it's so important to learn about the signs of drug use among our young people. And parents really don't believe that this could happen to their child, and sometimes the child would be somewhat disguising it because they know the parents would be disappointed. I think a lot of parents need a lot more knowledge, because knowledge is power," she said. In Hiding Larry Katz said, "When he was growing up he was hiding. There's more like a breakdown in communication. They go into their room by themselves, they isolate themselves from family activities. You think it's just adolescence, but it could be the beginnings of substance abuse. They're trying to break away from parents and trying to be their own person at that point, but they're still children." There are things parents should take notice of and take seriously - signs that there may be a problem. "When there's a change," Mr. Katz said, "a change in his mood, change in his grades, a change in his behavior, a change in his sleeping patterns, not getting up in the morning, maybe even signs of drug paraphernalia around the house, different friends --- when you put the picture all together, any one of those things would manifest itself as an indication." The dangers of an adolescent's instinct to experiment and break free of restrictions are enhanced by the rapidity with which addiction can claim a younger person. Mrs. Katz quoted from the book Choices and Consequences: What to Do When a Teenager Uses Alcohol/Drugs by Dick Shaefer: "Experience shows that it can take eight to 10 years for a 30 year old white male to reach the chronic stages of alcoholism, from the time he starts using alcohol to meet his needs. (It takes less time for females.) For a young person under age 15 who is using the same amount of alcohol, it takes fewer than 15 months." Wide Exposure Parents, Mrs. Katz fears, may underestimate the variety of drugs kids are being exposed to today, and also the seriousness of less feared drugs such as alcohol and marijuana. "I feel that children are being exposed to a lot of different things that we as parents have not been exposed to, and that parents really do not realize how many choices kids have, and if they make the wrong decision, it could be life-changing for them, and possibly death." "I don't think parents know that marijuana is laced," she said. "It could be laced with PCP, angel dust, heroin --- a former drug dealer told me that." "Everyone knows that, you can ask kids," she said. "If you ask them, "Did you know marijuana is laced?" some kids will raise their hands in the audience and other won't." "Marijuana is sometimes very minimized, because sometimes people remember back in the '60's. But now it's about 50 times the strength it used to be. So maybe people think it's not that serious, but it is. You can't tell me that it's not a significant drug." Stepping Stones One drug can lead to another. "Tobacco, marijuana, alcohol, when an adolescent uses those when they're adolescent - 11, 12, 13 up through high school --- there's a study that has indicated that by the time that person is 18, they'll be using cocaine." She quoted from literature published by the Governor's Prevention Partnership: "Twelve to 17 year olds who use marijuana are 85 times more likely to use cocaine. Sixty percent of adolescents who use marijuana before 15 will later use cocaine." What's a parent to do? Talk. A lot. And the sooner the better. At what age should parents start talking to kids? "What age do you tell children "Don't talk to strangers?" What age do we start protecting children from what's in our society? As soon as you can," Mrs. Katz said. "And there are age-appropriate materials that are available." She urged parents to check out her organization's Web site: www-couragetospeak.org, which also links to a variety of other informational Web sites. "Talking to your children is not just a one-shot deal," Mrs. Katz said. "It's an ongoing dialogue, it's an ongoing conversation." | ||
